Random
The curtain slowly falls and the house lights are turned up. There stands the lone figure... applauding the crowd.
It is the end of an era.
Today was my farewell. It was a really good day. We has STAX of food, great weather (even the hour of rain was great because it cooled things down significantly) and best of all, good friends. It was a day of hanging out. I loved it.
I'm sitting in the lounge now and all the people have gone, we've cleaned up and most of the house have either gone to bed or are on their way, so I'm sitting on the floor listening to Counting Crows (probably not the best choice right now) and wondering what this is that I'm feeling. I have the uncomfortable thought that I am avoiding what my heart is telling me, and that is always dangerous as it has a way of exploding in your face. I am not sure if I want to laugh or cry or scream so I do none of them. My head is holding on to the promises of God and the knowledge that He is in control. That His plans are for good and not for evil and that he has great designs on my life:
Joshua 1:3-7 I promise you what I promised Moses: `Everywhere you go, you will be on land I have given you' No one will be able to stand their ground against you as long as you live. For I will be with you as I was with Moses. I will not fail you or abandon you. "Be strong and courageous, for you will lead my people to possess all the land I swore to give their ancestors. Be strong and very courageous.
My head KNOWS this but my heart seems to be avoiding the subject completely. Tomorrow is my last day at church. That sounds so final: my LAST Sunday. Oh there it goes... what was that? My heart twinged just then. Maybe it's not avoiding the subject, maybe I am avoiding the subject.
It is not love we fear, but the absence of love.
But I am encouraged by something I realised recently:
Psalm 84 :6 When they walk through the Valley of Weeping, it will become a place of refreshing springs, where pools of blessing collect after the rains!
Do you see that? The weeping does not necessarily cease, but there is blessing to be found in the Valley. We learn to take joy in our sorrows, because we understand the blessing that comes from going through these things. Interesting. So when I start losing it tomorrow I'll remember that. It's all building my character.
Now, before I get even more random (and I think this is the most random I have been so far...) I'm gonna post some photo's from today.
I will attempt to have future posts make more sense.
Hi girls! Smile!
Inside, out of the rain.
The Matrix: Dodge This!
Reservoir Dogs
Monna and Ayesha... uhm, yeah.
Hours of Entertainment
I think they might be bored...?
Spot the Maniac
Ok, so you're gonna miss me!
posted by Unknown at 9:49 AM
3 Comments:
you know there are quite a few of us who have been in the place that you were when you wrote that blog, and i don't think i know anyone who has been able to articulate the feeling so well. That's it though, the head knows, the heart fights, and we sit in the middle and wonder what on earth is going on. The tears will come when they need to; as will the laughter.
If I may offer some advise? Relax. (not that you seem tense, but I know that I was...) You don't need to know how you feel, you don't need to understand, HE leads us by still waters, and HE makes us rest.. all we need to do is follow, one step at a time!
3:46 AM
Well, I don't know that when the time comes I am going to be any better then you. I will have a mix of emotions too friends, family I am leaving behind in the UK. But the best thing is that it isn't like you can never ever return to the UK. And God will give you more awesome friends and an awesome church where you are going. Because God is where you are going, He is going before you preparing a path(somewhere in the bible) Plus you are forever a Greystoke Palace chick and you will meet up with two other members in Oz!!!!!!!!!!
12:01 PM
I miss you, can't wait til you're here! BRING IT ON!!
11:32 PM
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